I have been moving cities constantly for about twelve years now. I like it because I learn new things, I get out of my comfort zone and meet many people, many of whom have become great friends for life (something strange for someone as introverted as me), but at the same time one of the disadvantages is that by moving I cannot be in contact with them; I haven’t even seen some of them again. Other times it is my friends who move.
Now that we are all adults and lead a “busy” life, how do we keep in touch with our friends without life and its chores making us forget? What I do is keep a Friendship maintenance agenda.
It consists of writing down at the beginning of the month the names of the friends I am going to contact by message or call and the date I will contact them. For example:
- Wednesday, May 5: Call David.
- Saturday, August 12: Send a message to Miguel.
That day I talk to them even if it is just to say hello. Sometimes the conversation flows, sometimes not:
- What’s up, how are we doing?
- Good good, thanks, and you?
- Good too, just here to say hello.
- Awesome, good to hear.
- Alright then, take care, big hug.
I like to think that hearing from a friend is always a cause for joy 😅. I must admit that at first I got a little sad when someone was uncommunicative, but I understand that everyone has their things to do and normally we are “busy”.
This technique has helped me to continue cultivating friendships. It might seem cold to have written down when you will call someone instead of it being something spontaneous, but I think it is even colder never to contact them again because life and occupations eat up your time.